May 2020 was a sad month without Eurovision, but at last the wait is over and I couldn’t be more excited. After trawling through the 40-odd entries from the Class of ’21 I’m pleased to report this is shaping up to be one of the best Eurovisions since I started following it, at least in terms of the music. That’s not to say there aren’t any duds because trust me, this batch has some real howlers too. I’ve arranged the songs into six categories from douze points to nul point. Here’s the overview:
Douze points
Switzerland – Tout L’Univers by Gjon’s Tears
I wasn’t too hot on Gjon’s Tears’ popular 2020 offering Répondez-Moi – I don’t know if I could take a distinctly average cinematic ballad winning the contest for two years in a row. Thankfully, this years’ Tout l’univers is simply in another league. Majestic Einaudi-esque piano builds to a soaring, haunting chorus melody which makes the most of Gjon Muharremaj’s exceptional upper range. Add some spectacular orchestral percussion and you have yourself a genuinely staggering three minutes of pop that might actually win the whole thing. If it does, this time I won’t be complaining.
France – Voilà by Barbara Pravi
Barbara Pravi’s stunning Voilà is about the most French thing I’ve ever heard – a beautiful female voice singing beautiful French lyrics over a beautiful piano and string quartet backing. Pravi’s performance is nothing short of exquisite, flinging out her arms whilst singing the title with more intensity in every repetition. The song winds up into a phenomenal finale where the tempo is unsettlingly cranked up like some hypnotic, endless drinking song. Pravi seems to enjoy her gradual descent into complete madness with plenty of vocal theatrics and I for one am enthralled. It’s got my vote. Voilà.
Croatia – Tick-Tock by Alina
Every year there seems to be one or two funky/disco tracks that of course always rank highly for me, but no one in recent times has done it as well as Croatia’s Alina (with a possible Icelandic exception). Sure, the instrumentation is a bit tacky and dated in places, but hold out for the first minute or so and you’ll be gifted with a delicious bass-led disco chorus. Alina’s sass is strong enough to give Dua Lipa a run for her money as the queen of 2020s retro pop. There’s even 70s synths and a pounding drum machine to complete the full dancefloor immersion. If your foot isn’t tapping during this one, you need to see a chiropodist.
Russia – Russian Woman by Manizha
Good luck categorising Russian Woman. What starts as a minimalist, hyper-modern rap segues into jazz-like saxophone-led bridge before a drop into an electronic dance beat led by a chopped-up Middle Eastern lute sample. Oh, and later there’s a choral chant section with pyrotechnics to make you think you’re witnessing some sort of satanic ritual. It has to be seen to be believed. The most bizarre thing: it actually works. A big part of that is the performance of Manizha, who is just about the coolest person in the world dancing around the stage in her red jumpsuit and traditional headdress, rapping about feminism and self-love. Her complete confidence makes for a thrilling listen, although the genre-mashing will likely make Russian Woman’s appeal too niche to be a championship contender. That said, stranger things have happened.
Italy – ZITTI E BUONI by Måneskin
Rock has now long been something of a dying genre in the mainstream, and Eurovision seems to reflect that. The only rock representation tends to be middling metal songs that only serve as a talking point for uncomfortable grandmas that were just switching channels. Italy, traditionally lovers of the operatic ballad, was the last country I expected to set this right but they’ve done just that with the killer indie rock track ZITTI E BUONI. The chorus could be better, but the rapidfire, punchy lyrics are refreshing and sharp. The Royal Blood-esque bass riff in the finale is where the song reaches a new level of brilliance in an increasingly brutal, head-banging jam. The best thing I can say about this track is that it sounds nothing like a Eurovision song. Instead, it sounds destined to be played at full volume in the messy bedrooms of teenage boys everywhere. As a teenage boy listening to this at full volume in a messy bedroom, I can testify.
Dix points
Iceland – 10 Years by Daði og Gagnamagnið
The cancellation of Eurovision 2020 must have been tough for all the participants, but I feel especially sorry for Iceland’s Daði Freyr. A long-time Eurovision fan, he made it to the finals on his second attempt with Think About Things, a quirky disco bop that happened to be objectively the best song of the year and looked primed to seal Iceland’s first Eurovision victory in history, becoming a bona fide international hit in the process. Now, Freyr must do the one thing that’s harder than writing a Eurovision-winning song: doing it twice. Of course, it’s a near impossible challenge, and it’s very difficult to listen to 10 Years without drawing unfavourable comparisons to that winner that never was. It’s not quite as catchy, not quite as funny, not quite as punchy, and of course the element of surprise is completely blown. Even so, it’s still the Daði we know and love and the song is enormous fun, but it’s not mind blowing. I hope and expect Iceland will nonetheless do well in the contest, even if half of their votes are out of sympathy.
Israel – Set Me Free by Eden
It’s cool, it’s up-tempo, it’s funky. I just can’t say no. I will say that key change is milking it a bit, but otherwise Eden Alene is virtually flawless.
Bulgaria – growing up is getting old by VICTORIA
VICTORIA’s 2021 effort is not only beautiful but understated, something which can’t be said of many Eurovision ballads that assume more instruments means more points. The chorus is cute and poignant too if you can get over how silly the title sounds on a surface level. This one is undoubtedly top five material, although I’d rather it not win like the bookies are warning.
Portugal – Love Is On My Side by The Black Mamba
The first few seconds of Love Is On My Side worryingly sounds like an attempted repeat of Salvador Sobral’s victorious track from 2017, but instead The Black Mamba serves up a memorable classic pop song, even if it takes more than a hint of inspiration from Hey Jude and With a Little Help From My Friends. Love Is On My Side seems to be criminally underrated by the bookies and likely won’t do well, but this warm gem of a track deserves a bit more love.
Czech Republic – omaga by Benny Cristo
The Czech Republic have returned with another fun and bubbly slice of indie pop, and again show themselves as an underdog worth rooting for. I just wish Benny (or Eurovision rulemakers) had the bravery to use “oh my god” instead of this baby-like replacement.
Lithuania – Discoteque by The Roop
Discoteque screams Eurovision, primarily with Vaidotas Valiukevičius’ uniquely bizarre performance and some cringe-worthy dance moves that will instantly win the favour of hardcore Eurovision fans everywhere. The song is decent and a worthy guilty pleasure track even if the hook is somewhat unexciting, but I’ll admit the main reason I gave Lithuania dix points was for the “bunny hop” dance move.
Huit points
Finland – Dark Side by Blind Channel
The Finns are fond of taking the obligatory hard rock spot in the final and have even won with a metal track before, and Dark Side this is one of their better attempts, although not without risk of falling into self parody with its constant guitar-swinging and power chords. An inventive middle eight and breakdown lends the song some well needed character, and the hook could definitely be worse.
United Kingdom – Embers by James Newman
The UK has returned with an above-average pop song and the Eurovision fans I know are going potty. Sure, Embers sounds like some ultra-radio-friendly pap from about ten years ago, but when compared to the pitiful recent efforts from Michael Rice or SuRie, this is good pap. James should be proud of himself. If Embers doesn’t venture into the left side of the scoreboard – a promised land unexplored by Brits since 2011 – I’ll be disappointed.
Serbia – LOCO LOCO by Hurricane
One of the most tolerable conventional pop tracks of the year, Serbia’s LOCO LOCO is danceable enough to really tear the roof off the Rotterdam Arena. That dance break is definitely a winner no matter what.
Cyprus – El Diablo by Elena Tsagrinou
Cyprus have been strong performers in recent years, and El Diablo is another club banger that will leave fans of Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance era happy. A bubbly little synth in the verse and a strange a cappella bridge will put to bed any accusations of a Gaga ripoff, however.
San Marino – Adrenlina by Senhit
Perhaps the only thing more unlikely than the UK submitting a listenable song is poor Eurovision laughing stocks San Marino submitting a listenable song. Yet Adrenalina rightly has plenty of genuine fans as a loud, outlandish pop track. The chugging percussion is perhaps a bit too much, but Senhit nonetheless sells the song well. I’d love to see her in the final.
The Netherlands – Birth of a New Age by Jeangu Macrooy
Jeangu Macrooy won’t make it two wins in a row for the Netherlands, but Birth of a New Age is still a fresh and catchy song commenting on the Black Lives Matter movement. The “rhythm is rebellion” hook may have been repeated a few too many times, but the gospel backings are rich and feel-good. I just can’t help but feel that with subject matter like this we’ve missed another chance for a jazz banger, a genre completely neglected by Eurovisioners. I’m still holding out for the brilliant UK jazz scene to make itself known sooner rather than later.
Latvia – The Moon Is Rising by Samanta Tīna
Samanta Tīna begins The Moon Is Rising by crowning herself “the Queen of the Night” and I certainly wouldn’t argue with her. She’s suitably badass in this boisterous trap banger, although it slightly loses its sense of direction in its latter stages.
Moldova – SUGAR by Natalia Gordienko
SUGAR is plenty of fun and will be a hoot on a live stage, but as a song the truth is it’s little more than average. The slightly irritating fat brass hook is the sort of catchy that will annoyingly pop into your head just as you’re trying to get to sleep.
Trois points
Malta – Je Me Casse by Destiny
Je Me Casse definitely sounds like the sort of song I can hear performed in a victorious encore in the small hours of 23rd May, but I’ll be honest my views on the track are mixed. The chorus is the major sticking point – that plasticky sax lead sounds alarmingly similar to the jarring electro swing style that will haunt anyone who saw the UK’s sad excuse for an entry in 2015. Destiny’s performance is strong and the song picks up in the final minute when that sax lead is mostly ditched, although it’s still nothing extraordinary. The timely message of female empowerment will also be a big vote-winner in Rotterdam, although if there’s one feminist anthem I want to win, it comes from a certain Russian Woman.
Azerbaijan – Mata Hari by Efendi
Although Mata Hari suffers from a chronic case of hooklessness, it’s still nice and danceable and well designed for the big stage. The incorporation of ethnic instruments is pretty smooth by Eurovision standards. It’s a shame things go a bit off the rails on the home straight.
Belgium – The Wrong Place by Hooverphonic
It’s a nice feel from the Belgians, but I doubt it will do very well at all in Rotterdam. The vocals are decidedly so so and the hook pedestrian. A pepped-up tempo or harder rock groove might have helped their cause.
Romania – Amnesia by ROXEN
It’s the female-led Eurovision ballad we’ve all heard before, but this song at least has a nice electronic edge. Still, it’s by no means a standout.
Denmark – Øve os på hinanden by Fyr Og Flamme
Denmark’s Øve os på hinanden has been soundly panned by fans so far but I’ll admit I’ve got a bit of a soft spot for this forgettable but fun 80s track. It’s impossibly cheesy and perhaps lacks a bit of self awareness, but the dancing and passion partly make up for the song’s failings. I’ve got my fingers crossed they’ll sneak into the grand final, if only because it looks like they’re having so much fun.
Ireland – Maps by Lesley Roy
Lesley Roy’s Maps is a solid synthy pop track although it offers little to make it stand out from the pack. It’s probably Ireland’s best entry in years, and deserves the grand final treatment.
North Macedonia – Here I Stand by Vasil
A very Disney-esque power ballad of epic proportions, although to be honest I’m not really buying it. The lyrics are too trite and the melody too safe. At least a gospel chorus at the climax comes to the rescue.
Spain – Voy A Quedarme by Blas Cantó
For a nation that knows how it feels to be British in recent contests, Blas Cantó’s track could be worse. Nonetheless, it’s quite difficult to find particularly good aspects of Voy A Quedarme. I guess his voice is quite nice? I’ve listened to it three times and I still can’t find a hook.
Greece – Last Dance by Stefania
Another bland addition to the glut of synthetic pop songs that crop up in the contest every year. I appreciate the more uptempo, driving groove in this one, though.
Un point
Georgia – You by Tornike Kipiani
You is a tough listen. Kipiani lists everything he wants (presumably during lockdown) over a characterless, plinkety guitar backing taken straight out of a pub open mic night. His voice is a bit wobbly in places too. I appreciate the effort put into that big choral finale though, and for that Georgia saves itself from being truly the worst of the worst in Eurovision 2021.
Sweden – Voices by Tusse
He may be only 19, but Tusse is evidently a very popular man in Sweden, having won Swedish Idol before storming to an unexpected victory at Melodifestivalen. That popularity might explain why the Swedes have let him get away with this humdrum wave-your-lighters-in-the-air pop track for their Eurovision 2021 pick. Tusse is full of unheard gems of wisdom like “forget the haters” or “go shooting like the star you are”; it sounds like someone needs to bring him back down to earth and tell him this song just isn’t the one. That said, the bookies are warning Voices may even win the contest, and it seems certain Tusse’s popularity will only grow after Eurovision. I for one won’t be joining the bandwagon.
Australia – Technicolour by Montaigne
Technicolour sounds incredibly difficult to sing, and Montaigne is a vocalist up to the task, but unfortunately her song just doesn’t cut it. The chorus is plastered with cheap orchestral hits that sound like something out of a 90s rap song. The song also boasts one of the most awkward key changes you’ll hear this year.
Albania – Karma by Anxhela Peristeri
Anxhela Peristeri is back with a high-budget action movie of a song, with an excessive number of super-bass slides, to the point of self-parody. A nonsensical deviation into a trap-style drum beat certainly doesn’t help her cause.
Austria – Amen by Vincent Bueno
Amen is a bit of a painful listen, with a more or less non-existent chorus melody. Poor Vincent Bueno tries his best to sell it, arms flinging and face scrunching, but at the end of the day no one is fooled by this lazy power ballad. “It all feels like you didn’t even try”, he belts at one point. You said it, Vincent.
Slovenia – Amen by Ana Soklič
Ironically this is just about as bad as the Austrian namesake, with those four familiar piano chords being used for all they’re worth (which isn’t much, at least when played as sluggishly as this). I suppose Ana Soklič’s vocal performance deserves some credit, but even that’s nothing special.
Estonia – The Lucky One by Uku Suviste
A laborious synth-pop plodder which subjects us to witness Uku Suviste reflect on a recent generic breakup. It should be a cathartic, emotional bop, but instead you’ll be wondering how three minutes could last this long.
Nul point
Norway – Fallen Angel by TIX
Norway, Norway, Norway. Where did it all go wrong? The consistent top ten contenders have misfired big time this year, with an impossibly sickly love song. As for staging, a sunglassed TIX obligingly spits out the vocals whilst wearing an enormous static pair of wings. And that’s it. No special contraptions in his backpack to extend the wings or wire-harness finale, just a self-important-looking bloke singing a pathetic song in an angel costume. If you haven’t vomited by the key change I salute you.
Germany – I Don’t Feel Hate by Jendrik
Germany’s four chord ukulele song sounds like Jendrik was asked to write a love-and-peace-man Eurovision song on the spot then rolled with it. To add insult to injury there’s a headache-inducing chorus section with just about every instrument ever. The lyrics aren’t any better. Verse two is as follows: “I really don’t want to be your rival cause for your kind it’s essential for survival (he did not just say that) yes I did, and I feel sorry, I don’t feel hate, that’s the whole point of the song”. Need I say more?
Poland – The Ride by RAFAŁ
It feels like Rafał Brzozowski listened to The Weeknd’s Blinding Lights once and thought “I could do that”. Unfortunately, he just can’t. The Ride is a vapid ripoff with pretty much nothing going for it. Perhaps the song would sound better with a different vocalist, because Brzozowski’s vocals are about as passionless and limp as they come. At least he spared us the pain of an attempted key change.
Ukraine – SHUM by Go_A
It sounds like the Ukrainians have noticed the madness going down in neighbouring Russia and gone for an equally unorthodox approach to their 2021 entry. SHUM similarly has harsh Ukrainian rapping and an ethnic instrument taking the chorus spotlight, this time a piccolo-like instrument. The problem is, Manizha impressions are not easy to pull off. That piccolo lead is truly awful and the bassline is begging for something more interesting, but instead Go_A favours mostly just one note. It winds up in an oppressive double-time rave that might work as an ironic track in a nightclub, but in reality SHUM is the stuff of nightmares.
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